Hacking Avatar.

Okay,not too much of spoiling will go on,but I must let out how much I love this movie. This may all sound ridonculous,for I am not giving myself enough time to process this movie! Oh my Sam! It is more than likely,the best thing I have ever seen. I would love to live in a world where my hair connects to a tree and hacking talks to it. And to have my own dragon,WTF!? Okay, I really wanna be a movie critic sometime in the future,and this is my first one so it will be really bad. But I can't help it. This movie is the shit. That's all that can be said. Now, I do realize there may be some downfalls in the plot, I haven't noticed any yet with my somewhat good memory,but I can feel it there. Nagging at me saying,"MOVIE NOT THOUGHT OUT HERE!" But at the moment, I am truly astonished with this movie. Just the fact that mother nature really is that powerful has me questioning, could all that be us if we hadn't fucked this planet up? Seriously,what if something happened far in the past that just destroyed all intelligence that we could have had!? Just thinking about this makes me weak in my stomach. Gosh,I will be writting a note and posting a blog on myspace,which i never do, for this bad ass movie. I'm not even describing it any,just saying I love it. But honestly,just go see it and hopefully you'll be on the same page as me. I cried about three times in this movie.And the actor of Jake Sully,GORGEOUS!!! But is it just me,or did anyone else feel toward the end that one of them should have died? Would've been sad as hell,I know. But honestly, I think it would have seriously won if one of them died. Yes you're probably thinking, "damn Baylee,everybody died in this movie? You wanted more too?" But i Just feel it would've made a hell of a better ending. Not saying it was a bad one or anything, just saying that would have made it better.Well i think it's time for me to go to bed.Might process this movie better with some sleep. good night everyone.

btw,GO SEE AVATAR!!especially in 3D.

Old Crows. $)

Today, I have officially started my diet. I don't really no what's going to be in my diet, but I'm going to start keeping track of what I eat everyday and at night I will point out all the bad intakes. Then the next day I will try to stay away from that and eat healthier. With school lunches though, I may have to start packing. And the days I forget, looks like I'm going hungry. Their food is fattening and the salads will get quite annoying. I'm really hoping for the best with this. Also, I will stop worrying about the small things I do worry about. If there is anything.
I can't wait till January! I'm dying my hair and cutting it similar to as shown. My school should allow it with it being natural colors. [Fingers crossed] Tomorrow I'm also buying stuff to start gauging my ears. I'm at 18G, [basic pierced size] and I'm going up to a 16-14G tomorrow. I'm going to start slow because I'm not one for pain in my ears. Now my lip area, I just wanna pierce them for pain. Haa, that doesn't sound weird at all... Anywho, if I like my hair blonde, I'm getting my septom done. Hopefully my mom will let me! She allowed nose and eyebrow, but I'm scared she's going to say no to septum because, and I quote to ther piercings, "It looks stupid so you're not doing it under my house." I'm not going to lie, it can look stupid, but if it does on me I will fo sho take it out. But I dunno yet, still thinking about it. And I'm not gonna ask till I know for sure. Haah.
So moving on to other mishaps in my life recently. Well Friday I had my blood taken because I have been getting some serious lightheadedness. It could possibly be diabetes or lead poisoning. Either one, it's no good. Also, I've been slightly losing my vision. So I made need to get glasses and go to the eye doctor sometime soon. I kinda don't want glasses, but eh. Shit happens, you know? Well that's what has been going on the life of Beary. Off to see Paranormal Activity. Peeaaaaccccceee.

Santeria. -.-

Recently,I've come to realize that I'm an extremely jealous person.It's overwhelming.It's weird though because someone who I honestly don't like at all will get a girlfriend or like someone and I'm really jealous.It's so awkward,because I won't even talk to the kid ever,or find him attractive,,but I still get jealous.But if I meet them as taken,I really don't ever care if they're single or taken.It's really weird and I don't really like it.I try to control my jealousy over things,but it's always there.I also notice when I like someone,I feel so insecure when they talk to other girls.Maybe this IS just a big insecurity.Maybe it's because I lack self confidence too much.But how do I change this?I always feel fight,smelly,bad hair, and horrible face.But I think it's a common thing for some teenage girls to not like themselves.Eventually I'll get to that point in my life where I just don't care at all anymore.But for the moment,I care about everything!I need to stop eating so much,,but I get bored and having nothing to do so i eat!ughhh,,,,

Never Wanted To Dance. *-*

Recently,I watched Monkeybone. Have any of you seen that? Well nevertheless, ever since I've realized I miss nightmares. As a child, I would have terrible, horrifing dreams every night. But after ten or eleven or so, they went away. Now though, I miss them. I love that heart racing feeling you get and the whole waking up in the middle of the night thing,,, it makes me feel so alive and so great. I love fear. That sounds horrible, but it is so true. Fear makes me feel like I should be thankful for happiness and calmness, and lately I haven't had fear. I need it basically, otherwise I take things for granted. That's why I like pain. I love,love,love,love,love pain. So emo,,but so true. This sounds kinky, but when people hurt me I could never love them more. It just sends this jolt in my body that,,,i don't even know. Pain is my drug. It makes me feel alive. It makes me feel... happy. I'm not scared of death, I play with it. I put myself in trouble everyday, it just feels great. Like that moment where you feel like everything is going to crash but after I want more of that feeling. I like to cause mischief, that's why I always want to rebel, I feel good doing it. I feel dangerous, unstoppable, capable of anything. At the same time though, I don't want to be causing pain to anyone, I just want them giving it to me. Does that make any sense? I feel like a murder typing some of the stuff I just did, but please believe me;I could never harm anyone. Not even people that deserve it. Infact, it's the ones that deserve it that I want to save the most. I don't know why, but if I had to chose between an innocent person against a guilty, I would pick the guilty. If I could though, I'd save both. I just think...i don't even know what I think. Well maybe I should stop before you get terrible,god awful things about me.

Headlights Look Like Diamonds. :D

Why is life so confusing and so hard? Why are we even here honestly?What would it be like if we weren't here,like without my soul.What would I be doing?I wouldn't exist,so what would that make me?Who am I?what is this thing called God that most devote their lives to?Just what is this word.I always feel like I'm close to the answer,,but then it just slips away.



Red lights mean you're leaving,
white ones mean we're turning,
to tell me how this story ends,
and i'll keep them fires burning.



This just means new subject,i can't overthink that.So what if one day I become famous?Wouldn't that be a sight.I wanna become internet popular,so all the internet n00bs know my name and all them country folk have no idea.I wanna be in popular web shows,internet magazines,being mentioned in iCarly,anything.Like Fred,but less annoying.Maybe like Mitchell Davis...but then again he was a major jerk to his ex best friend and he is a freak in person.Like,,,yeah.My people know his people and know him.Like my friends sister hangs out with his girlfriend.haha.So I could pretty much meet him if i really wanted to,but nah.He reall isn't worth it.just another main stream guyy,,like oli sykes.ICKY!I will stick to Nick Miller,and be happy.
Duuudddeeee,I just found out Henry Homesweet AND Unicorn Kid AND Talk To Animals is on iTunes.good for them.They are great house/electro type shit bands.No wait,apparently they are counted and Chiptune?There is a new genre....wow.Apparently popular in England.Go figure,that's where all the scene kids and Babycakes is.Which brings me to mention,,I met Paul Griffiths at Warped Tour.What a day that was,seeing two beautiful men in one day!Paul and Nick Miller!Yummnumnum. :)

I Lust You. n_n

i wish time went by faster.life would be easier.not really.but atm,it would be awesome if it did go by faster.i wish i had $500 atm too.that would help me with so many things.if only life was as easy as i imagine it.hahaha.no,i wish i was 16 so i could drive and and could go drive to a work that i would have and make a steady income instead of saving up the few times i do get money.:/life is just a big bundle of fun.wait,i wish i was 18 so i could get all the piercings and tattoo's i want without asking my mom.also,i would live by myself so i could do anything i wanted to do.age blows.it has no meaning to me anyway.i will move to canada one day where you can do anything you want at any age basically.such a simplier life they all must live lucky bastards.i'm stuck in ohio.one of the worst states america could have.so boring and so lifeless.all there is is fucking cornfields.gaygaygaygaygay.i'm not really a city person,but i'm not a country person either!this place is just terrible.i am getting out of ohio asap.even if i don't have any money at all,i'm getting the hell out.i'm going to chicago for college to party my ass off.then i'm going to alaska to mellow out.finally,i'll go to canada or germany and just be an easy ass going person.yay.that sounds like a kick ass plan.but somewhere in there i want to drive all through america and meet people like crazy.haha,life really is simplier in my head.everything is just easy going and just nice.:D



You and I get along famously;
I need you and you need me.
Staring from the cover of a magazine,
selling our souls for the highest fee.


You and I carry on strenuously;
carrying the burden of publicity.
Straight to another inevitably,
sell photos of the newborn for the highest fee.


man,all i wanna do is rave and party.haha.and all the things you do while in those things as well.oh,i can just feel i will be a partyholic when i'm in college.i can tell i'll just be so outgoing and easy to get along with.that will be better days.but for now,i'm just beary.simple beary in her little school in the middle of a damn corn field.all i can do now is ride my bike to the river,swim a little,and get tan.and for winter,roll around in the snow.♥oh how i love the snow.and oh how i hate the heat and don't get me started on humidity.can't live with it,but without i itch like crazy.like right now,my tummy,back,arms,hands,and face are the itchiest ever.it's suicidal.i can only use so much lotion.and my family,,they are all so opposite and hard to really get along with.i'm not misunderstood,i'm just ignored.haha.i can only look forward to getting away for four years,then coming back to this hell hole because i know damn well i will pussy out of going to canada and alaska.i'm going to end up living in ohio forever.what a waste of a life.what a tragedy. :///

Fish. *-*

Today,I feel so gross and icky.I think I have washed my face five times today,but it still feels dirty.I just feel so nasty.I haven't really talked to anyone today besides Chris and Alex.I feel like a whore for some reason.I feel so fat today too.I really should stop eating.I wish I didn't feel pain,that way I couldn't feel my tummy growl when I don't eat.Eghh,,I was supposed to clean my room today,but I have zero energy.All I want to do anymore is party,party,party.But there are no parties where I live.Well the kind of parties I want to go to I mean.I wish I lived in Clarksville.Then I could walk to my friends house.Then I wish I lived in Wilmington,so I could wallk around the town.Ugh..I wish I had money too.


There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself.
Never wanted to dance with anyone but you.

I really want to see Mindless Self Indulgence.They are freaking awesome.They get me by.Haha,especially that one song talking about why he loves his mom.That makes me want to just rave like crazy.Haha.
Well I have been noticing that I am changing a lot.I really think I am becoming a better person.I just can't wait till February.My transformation will be complete.Haha,that sounds so f*ing corny.But it is so true.Damnnn ittt,this song has been stuck in my head all day!and it barely has lyrics.It's Giving Up by Imperative Reaction.Reminds me of Nine Inch Nails.Throw away,what made us alive!Haha,well I think that's what they say. :P